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Jun 30 2009

Weiner Free Traffic Jam

Filed under: What's Up by caen

On Saturday I needed to pick up a friend from the Tenderloin district of San Francisco. After exiting the freeway, I drive down onto 9th street and got immediately jammed in an unmoving mess of cars. Can’t park, can’t move, can’t go anywhere. But I can see this sign that says something like “Civic Center Streets Closed Saturday and Sunday”.  I crawl along for an hour, until I make it onto Van Ness, right across from the City Hall. Something doesn’t seem right.   There are many under dressed women spanning a wide distribution of attractiveness, albeit skewed to the ugly side. Risking life and limb from a 0 mph car crash, I pull out my trusty web enabled non-iphone and check what is up. Well Son of a Bitch. It’s Pride week. And I don’t mean what the Apple i-phone, i-everything, owners feel about their overpriced gadgets (although there is probably about 90% overlap). And guess what. I am stuck in a dyke march. And I don’t mean the kind the German Wehrmacht held in The Netherlands in 1940.

I have been stuck in a lot of crappy traffic around beautiful nothern California, like the tipped over gas truck that spilled its load and melted the freeway. Or the time I was stuck right across from a ripped open vegetable truck that spill thousands of bell peppers all over the freeway. But being stuck in a dyke march is by far the coolest. How many people in Nebraska get to say that?

Not being one to miss a gay old time, I managed to make it back to San Francisco 0n Sunday for the Pride parade and the giant street party that follows. Having spent last Sunday at the NASCAR race at Sonoma, I was looking forward to a change from my previous weekend hanging out with a closed minded and self adsorbed monoculture.

Speaking of closed minded and self adsorbed monocultures, there is a lot less difference between the NASCAR and Pride crowd than you might think. But one thing is for sure. The women sure dress a lot skankier at the Pride parade.  And considering that the crowd was about 10% gay, and about 88% people who wish they were, a lot of skany women makes for a gay time, gay or not.

Jun 18 2009

She got quite a set of fake bonds

Filed under: What's Up by caen

As reported earlier, there is this story floating around about 2 japanese dues trying to cross from Italy to Switzerland with 136 billion in US bearer bonds.

Reports have surfaced that these are real bonds, which if so, you have got to ask, WTF!!!

I would be tempted to say, “let the conspiracy theories begin”, but when you are talking about two guys carrying around 136 billion in reportedly legitimate debt obligations, no explanation can be considered too weird.

Including that one suggesting that the US government has been secretly issuing debt under the table to keep it off the books.

Yikes.

Jun 13 2009

Sherdog vs. Slashdot - the winner

Filed under: Just Goofy by caen

As great as it is to click your way through the clever antics of the linux geeks gracing the pages of slashdot.org, never, never, never, have they ever posted a thread as cool as this one from the MMA knuckleheads at sherdog.com.

And with responses like this:

it makes me feel kinda weird fwapping to incest, not enough to stop though.

How can you go wrong.

Jun 12 2009

Stealing is hard work

Filed under: What's Up by caen

I steal plenty of pencils and paper from the supply cabinent at work. Yeah, I feel pretty good about my cleverness. Until now. In case you missed it, some dudes have been accused of trying to cross into Switzerland with 130 billion in US treasuries stuffed into their underwear.I definitely need a job where the supply cabinet is stacked up with billions in T-bills.

I can see the look of surprise on the faces of the border agents that found this stuff. I’m sure they have pulled more then one bag of  cocaine out into the sunshine during a body cavity search, but I bet they never expected to yank out a 130 big ones in T-bills.All this makes me wonder. If those securities do turn out to be real, just how many of these things are laying around in big, unguarded piles. It’s a testament to the Obama times that 130 billion in US debt obligations is so insignificant that no one worries what mattress they placed them under.

Jun 07 2009

Back off man!

Filed under: Just Goofy by caen

Forget Ju-Jitsu or Muay Thai, combat Tai Chi is the most awesome of the ancient martial arts.

Jun 03 2009

Need a new job?

Filed under: What's Up by caen

I’m pretty sure that I am getting close to getting canned from my current gig. But there are better jobs out there.

Jun 03 2009

Wrong Industry

Filed under: What's Up by caen

If the computer geek industry can have these babes at it’s trade shows, how come we can’t have them at Photonics West.

Laser dorks must demand equal treatment to computer geeks. Dammit Obama. Do something. Where is the change we can believe in?

May 25 2009

Google you a new one

Filed under: What's Up by caen

I’ll admit it. I like Google. I don’t know why. I use Yahoo to search and for their email.

So with the recent furor about the several seconds outage of the Gmail service, I though I should head over and get meself a gmail account to see what all the fuss is about. First things first, Google dudes have designed the most unusable web email interface in the universe. But not to be detered, I sent myself some information about some exchanged traded notes for getting my meager savings out of US dollars before Barack the Magnificent devalues them into toilet paper. And that’s when I noticed something interesting.

As soon as I recieved the email I sent myself about exchange traded currency funds and forex brokers, I saw a little text ad at the top of the page for various financial instruments, such as gold ETFs and Forex accounts. Sweet! Google’s algorithms are reading my email and sending me adds that I can actually use. I couldn’t help but be impressed.

But that got me thinking. Annoying dorks like Paul McCartney are running around blocking the google street view cars. Japanese anti-racist facists are accusing Google of inciting hatred with Google Earth. Just about everyone is having some sort of aneurysm over Google spying on their life. Yet these same otherwise intelligent folks (notice the sarcasm) have no problem letting Google’s all knowning super bots dig through their every email to their banker, hooker or lawyer (nothing against hookers, really). And then they blow a hissy-fit when their gmail gets stuck for less time than it takes the surfer-dude at the starbucks to make a 6 dollar looserachino.

Hey Barack, I got an idea for you. Instead of spending 14.7 trillion dollars to fix the medical records system, why don’t you let Google do it for you.  While you are at it, if there is something that you are thinking of changing for the sake of change, why don’t you let Google have a crack at it. Given the choice of handing my privacy over to you or Google, I’ll think I’ll take my chances with the big G. And unlike anything you are planning, it will probably be free.

May 23 2009

Is that a hard drive in your pocket?

Filed under: Just Goofy by caen

Researchers at UC Berkeley have determined that women are attracted to the smell of anti-static bags used to package computer hardware.

Maybe for Berkeley computer geek girls. But who wants to hang out with them? Now, it is clear that the article is a poor piece of computer satire, but there ARE plenty of party girls that are attracted to the smell of anti-static bags filled with a certain white powder.

And those girls are the kind of chicks that you really want to hang out with.

May 10 2009

iPiling On

Filed under: What's Up by caen

Poor iphone lovers just can’t get a break. First, it made them all gay. Then it turned the few reasonable people who bought an iPhone by mistake into assholes. And now, even the technology web sites are starting to point out the truth.